Gun Scare Prank
Monday, December 29, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
A woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church
services, when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the
act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled: 'Stop! Acts 2:38!'
(Repent and be Baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so that your sins
may be forgiven.)
The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and
explained what she had done.
As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar: 'Why
did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to
'Scripture?' replied the burglar. 'She said she had an Ax and Two 38s!'
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
03. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
04. People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?
05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
07. Things you buy now won't wear out.
08. You can eat supper at 4 pm.
09. You can live without sex but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15 . Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.