Update #??

Okay so it's been a while since I updated. Argh. Life went sideways for a bit. I think its important to be candid about life's setbacks as well as the goals and successes, but I don't want to devote too much time/attention to the mistakes. So let me recap here.

My big/awesome whale contract ended and it took three weeks to replace it. That's always a busy time for me. I am back to work but at half time and that's cramping my style a bit.

My wife and I spent some tax return on a beach trip but our ten month old sucked any sort of relaxation out of the experience leaving us stressed from trying to prep for the week and recover from the trip.

We immediately started car shopping to replace my wife's tiny yet loved car with one that fits our baby's car seat. That turned into a mess, but ultimately we triumphed, so it ends well.

I managed to get my scifi secret project drafted off to the editors about a day early so that I could try to relax at the beach. Best laid plans, right? Anyway that's another win. Not sounding too bad, right?

Well I haven't updated my project hopper in about two months and that leaves me a bit stressed. You see I try to go through quarterly with a big review which keeps me on track and my end of year/new year review is vital to my peace of mind. More than just the annoyance of working budget files and plans that say 2014 not doing a review is an indication that I haven't taken the "me" time defrag my brain. It's hard to explain but if you read "Getting Things Done" by David Allen there's a good explanation of my situation under the term Open Loops. (In short: things we unconsciously feel obligated to do that we don't have any plan to accomplish.)

So I started asking myself, "am I doing an other avoiding behaviors?" Yes, I was being intolerant of other humans when they did very human things. Then I asked myself, "what am I avoiding?"

The truth, after much reflection, is that I'm waiting on a few big projects, and job opportunities that are long over due and I'm feeling like God is holding out on me. I let that unconsciously keep me from moving closer to God in my spiritual life. Items in my project hopper would have made plain that I was neglecting some of the important things in my life.

I read a brief article by Mike Pink that talked about spending deliberate time honoring God. My prayer life hadn't gone down hill all this time, but I wasn't setting aside time to meditate on how big and how generous God is. Even though I accepted that it was true, when I tried out Pink's suggestion I could feel myself realign from inside out. It's embarrassing because one of my works in process is a book on living from inside out. Yet here I was taking my self worth from my circumstances instead of being who I am uniquely in those circumstances.

When we take our identity from our relationship with God, when we remember we're built in His image and restored to perfection by his work, that's when stress goes down and we start impacting the environment around us, instead of being transformed by our environment.

For more on this topic, read my book "On Becoming a Man."

Spiritual Post and Life Update

Matt. 5:13 – 14

¹³ “You are the salt of the earth; but if salt has lost its taste, how can its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything, but is thrown out and trampled under foot.

¹⁴ “You are the light of the world. A city built on a hill cannot be hid. ¹⁵ No one after lighting a lamp puts it under the bushel basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all in the house. ¹⁶ In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven.

So what does it mean to be the light and the salt? I’ve been on a long quest to discover what that means for me, and I want to hand you this chunk of wisdom in the hopes that you get some mileage out of it. Then I want to give a fast update that’s closely related to this topic.

To be salt is to be grounded in the covenant God has with you. There is two parts to the covenant 1) the part that applies to every believer and 2) the part that is unique to you. The second part leads directly to the topic of light.

1)      The covenant refers to the Hebrews 9:15. Christ, who never sinned or disappointed the Father, wrote a will that in the event of his death we should inherit everything due to him. We live under the full favor of God toward his only son.

2)      Because God knew us before he made the world and we are made in his image, we know that God intended something unique and special when he designed us, and that’s what we are restored to in that inheritance. So part of this covenant—the life we’ve inherited—is restoration to something. (I know we’re usually told we just get to escape death, but that’s just Mercy, we also get Grace.)

Being the light refers to living in the truth. That also comes in two forms. 1) You can’t live in light if you aren’t being authentic to who you are. 2) Our woundedness is meant to be shared with a fellowship.

1)      So it’s important that we seek out the person inside that reflects who God see us as. Or put another way, its important that we live not only as a redeemed person, but as the unique version of redeemed person that God intended before sin entered the world.

2)      We can’t be vulnerable with everyone, or even most people, but there should be some people with whom we can let it all hang out. We need to humbly receive the input of that fellowship as part of the promised transformation from glory to glory.

So when we put all this together, being the salt and the light is about living in what Christ did for you, as the unique person God intended, in vulnerability with a fellowship. But it’s important to bring it full circle and say that the good work Christ began in you he will be faithful to complete it (Phil. 1:6). This transformation is not entirely our responsibility (Romans 4). The promise (covenant) to Abraham was given before his circumcision (obedience to the law).

So obviously there’s a lot to be explored there and it really doesn’t work to just give it all in one multi-vitamin. All of this is another approach to the concept of Glory and Calling. God meant something unique when he designed us, and it’s vital that we explore what that is. It’s equally important that we not take on responsibility for manifesting that new person. If we do that, we begin to strive, which only leads to pursuing the worldly (outword) reality of our glory. That path leads to frustration and takes our eyes off the source and example—Christ.

The inside person is more important to God and we’ve no perspective from which judge our inner progress. Even while we progress toward completeness we need to understand that we’ll never make it in this life, which is why Christ makes us complete.

I KNOW! Very confusing, but a vital concept. Even while we are learning to walk in completeness (and our unique glory) we depend on Christ’s mercy and must accept that we’ll not achieve it.

The reason I’m on about this is because I’m sick of all the focus going to mercy. As long as we frame the work of Christ in our life as a death on the cross to let us off the hook for being wicked sinners, we are missing the entire concept of Glory. Mercy is ever important, but it’s the insurance policy. LIFE comes from walking with Christ and a fellowship of believers in the inheritance of God’s favor and restoration of God’s plan for your life.

What gets the attention in most churches today, is how wicked we were and how good God is to kill Jesus instead of us. I want to shine a light onto the inheritance Christ died to give us.

So…Update

I’ve got some amazing opportunities coming in the next three to four months, and I’ve been knocking myself out to bring them about. I’ve been making some uncomfortable sacrifices too, and that’s often okay for a season. The challenge comes when things get pushed off or don’t come off as planned. Simple delays cause me to think, “just work a bit harder to catch up.” Of course anther delay follows, and another. Then interruptions happen and other plans become impacted. The next thing you know I’ve robbed time from my other values for too long and everything I’ve built evaporates.

This never used to be an issue for me. I had plenty of other challenges, but vainly chasing the American dream wasn’t one of them. It’s traditionally not been my heart of heart, but now that I have a wife and child my desires have changed. Now they look pretty middle-class American to the casual observer. So I’ve been dealing with a double whammy—pursuing things the world says I ought to want for what in my mind is somewhat nobler motives, and pursuing goals that don’t feed the man inside as directly as my former pursuits.

The journey/battle of merging my heart’s desires, old and new, has been rough. I confess to experiencing enormous stress, and I should know better. The reality is that I will receive what God has in store for me, and my limited attention span is best invested on things that feed and grow the inner man. So for weeks I’ve been probing the most authentic things that God and I discovered together. I’d be lying if I didn’t confess to near constant distractions by “real world” stuff, but I’ve been hugely blessed also.

The conclusion here is that I’m deciding not to stress about what I get accomplished or not. I’m not going to pressure myself to make things come about at all costs. I believe God is aware of my needs and my desires and will manifest the right things. I can still work toward goals, but I’m done striving. I can still practice doing things in the most efficient manner, but I’m done feeling bad when I end the day with more to do than I started the day with.

Also, I’m going to rebrand with all this in mind. I’m going to spend some time on the projects that feed the inner man so that I have more energy and focus for the “real world” stuff.

What that means for this blog, and those who follow it, is that I’ll be expanding and rebranding onto another platform and this blog will continue, but in a more focused roll.

God bless, and have a great day.

See also

Ephesians 5:8, 11

Colossians 4:6

Luke 14:34-35

Luke 15:1

John 8:12

Mark 16:15

Mark 9:35-50

1 Cor. 1:26

Romans 1:18-20

Quick update: December 2014

Hey everyone. I've been super slammed--which is awesome, but crazy. I'm more swamped than ever and my blogging suffers. (Actually I have been blogging, but for paying clients.)

I wanted to give a quick update:
1. My Spiritual growth has been subtle but good. It's great how God comes through for you when you're busy. I'm making every effort to continue to make time to hang out with God, but it's been really busy. I'm not satisfied.

2. I've been really blessed to have my mom help with childcare, and to have a happy 8 month old baby who sleeps through the night (most of the time). I also have a happy marriage to the most beautiful woman in the world. My next improvement will be to find a way to have family dinners together starting with a couple times a week.

3. I'm happy to report that I'm accomplishing my exercise goals. I wish I could say the same for my diet goals. The net effect is that I'm not losing weight, but I'm not gaining weight either. So if I can make it through the holidays without losing ground I'm prepared to call that a victory, and January is going to be a whole new campaign.

4. I'm still valiantly trying to crank out my scifi 1st draft by the end of the month/year. It's going well, but I'm behind.

5. One of the best things about my new regular writing contract is that I"m using a lot of the things that I went out of my way to learn, purely hoping that I'd get the chance to cash in on it. So take it from me, no matter what a pain in the rear it is, never stop growing your skills. Another nice thing is that I'm gaining some new skills on the job. I normally prefer to bid work for the flexibility it offers. And for the fact that I can increase my pay by working faster/better than the next guy. BUT being in a team environment again reminds me how much I learn from coworker interaction.

6. No update would be complete without mentioning my new gig at Tire Kickers. I love the guys I'm working with and I love working as a writer for start up companies. Tire Kickers stands apart from most of the companies I've worked for. They really count on using great, innovative ideas to achieve goals instead of old boy networks, bullying, marketing brainwashing, etc. It's nice to work for people who aren't jaded.

7. The holidays are pretty much taking up any effort I could expend toward relaxation. I'm going to take as much time off next week as I can, but even if I can't, I'm enjoying work. The only person working harder than me is my wife. We're up at 5 every morning and the other day she didn't sit down until about 45 mins before we had to go to bed. I have put in plenty of 16 hour days before, but I just can't run that hard anymore. We went three weeks without a day off earlier this fall and I'm just sapped.

Well I hope everyone else's life is going awesome. I should find my new groove in the new year. If not I'll have to make it happen somehow.

Bonus for making it to the bottom of the page: Writing contests for the next two months.
http://www.aerogrammestudio.com/2014/12/16/competitions-for-writers-january-february-2015/

Guest post from Bill: I encourage you to read it

Jillian and I and Holding onto Hope Ministries wish you and your family a joyous Holiday Season and best wishes for a blessed New Year. The assurance of living eternally thanks to our Creator coming to this earth to suffer and die then miraculously conquer death is the comfort this season is about. We pray that you experience the joy of knowing Christ. Holding onto Hope had the opportunity to share with New Life Community Church last October about the lifetime devastation caused by sexual abuse. Jillian and I have been doing this for nearly seven years now and each time we share it encourages those that have never spoken or have not worked on the difficult work of healing to speak out.  (You can view the sermon at New Life by following the link below)   This month we are beginning a healing program in partnership with New Life. Over a dozen people have connected with Jillian and I since we spoke about the pain they live with everyday. Healing from sexual abuse is a lifelong process.   It is so encouraging for us after a long time to see survivors coming forward to begin healing. We look forward to the new year and the opportunity to walk with many who are hoping for healing and joy. As the year ends Jillian and I encourage you to consider sharing with your community the great need to shed light on this issue. History has showed us that when the issue is brought to the light, those that are suffering in the silence of shame become empowered to reach out for help and stop the years of silence and begin speaking.   Individuals, communities and families begin to recover joy and even physical comfort from the confusion and pain.   This issue quietly disables every community.   We must have the courage to speak out to keep evil in its place. Speak out this year. We would love to share with your community.  As the year closes Jillian and I humbly ask you to consider a donation to Holding onto Hope. We have had five residents in our home this past year. Our home serves as the Hope House for the ministry. It requires financial means to house the residents and help them recover and begin healing. We would love to do more, but the financial resources aren't there. Any gift goes directly to the ministry needs and allows us to continue to provide safety for the broken among us. Thanks for considering walking with us. Merry Christmas and best wishes for a prosperous and joyful 2015.

Watch Bill and Jillian speaking at New Life Community Church:http://www.newlifeonline.com/sermon/real-life-heal-the-wound-leave-the-scar/ Heal the Wound...But Leave the Scar...

HOPE HOUSE NEWS I would like to introduce you to the Hope House newest resident, meet Andrew. Andrew came to the Hope House the beginning of October and we are delighted to have him. Andrew is studying at The Phoenix Art Institute in the Culinary Artsprogram. His goal is to graduate in March of 2015 and begin working as a certified chef. It has been a long time dream and the end is in sight.  Rather remarkable actually, after you hear a little of Andrew's story. In first grade CPS workers and Military Police came to Andrew's home to remove him and his sister. His parents went through a tumultuous divorce two years earlier. This time Andrew's mother's boyfriend was threatening the children's safety. Child Protective Services split the children up and placed Andrew temporarily in a behavioral center while they arranged for a Foster Home for Andrew. That began a 12 year journey through over thirty foster homes and a dozen different schools for Andrew. In many of the foster homes there was physical, sexual, and verbal abuse. There was neglect and abandonment. At age 17 after his fourth year in the ninth grade, Andrew hit the streets. Free from the Foster Care system he lived in a tent in the woods cooking on a small grill and roaming the neighborhoods for the next year. When Andrew turned nineteen he was introduced to North Carolina Families United; a non-profit organization that provides recovery and services for the many that are neglected. Andrew then worked as a mentor with NCFU for children that had similar experiences of neglect and abuse. He became a spokesman exposing the dysfunction of the system and a strong advocate for change.         In 2011, Andrew testified before the United States Congress along with Hollywood star Jamie Lee Curtis and Surgeon General Regina Benjamin.  Andrew with Jamie Lee Curtis. He shared his story on behalf of the many surviving in silence. The work with NCFU inspired Andrew to return to school where instead of just securing a GED, he earned his high schooldiploma in 2009. In 2012 Andrew came to Arizona with a dream to earn a degree in the Culinary Arts. As you can imagine, one does not recover from a lifetime of abuse and neglect without a lot of time, a lot of thinking, and a lot of pain. Andrew is doing great. Living in a community of grace and kindness as one rebuilds a damaged foundation of life is critical to legitimate heart change. Jillian and I are so proud of Andrew and his courage to stay the course. It's pretty nice to have a chef in the house too.     Pray for Andrew won't you. He has some challenging days ahead. He has some incredible days of joy ahead too. Pray for the vision of the Hope House. For now, the Hope House is a place for the one lost sheep that our Lord asks us to go find and care for. We pray the Lord will lead us to many more.   The Hope House       Announcing the Release of Love Goes Both Ways                The front door swung open and Jillian shouted, "Hey everyone, come and see what I have." The sound of dropping toys and shuffling feet came from the corners of the house to greet mom in the living room.  Jillian gently set down the basket and stood smiling from ear to ear as the children peeked in. Finally, but looking puzzled, Jaimee looked up at Jillian and said, "It's a baby.  Mom, what are you doing with a baby?  Where is her mother?"               Jeff jumped in.  "Why is that thing taped to her nose?"              "She's cute" laughed Julee.             "I got her at work" mom responded.               "They're giving out babies at work?" Jaimee asked.              "Sort of," Jillian answered.  "There were six there today and the DCFS only allows a house to have five and since it is Friday, one would have to either go back to the hospital or they decided a Registered Nurse caregiver  could bring one home for the weekend.  I thought it would be fun to bring Jeanine home, so I did.   Her smile is absolutely precious."             "What will dad say" Julee asked smiling.               "He'll be fine." Jillian responded. "She is only staying for the weekend.  I will take her back on Monday and most likely DCFS will have a permanent place for her next weekend."             "So what's the thing in her nose mom" Jeff asked, still wanting to know.             "It's how we feed her," she answered.              "You're kidding, right?  What's wrong with a bottle like normal kids?"              "Well, that's a problem.  She's not a normal kid."              LOVE GOES BOTH WAYS; Surrendering to the Truth of Dependence is now available.    Order Today Upcoming Events and Prayer Update...   December 7 - Organizational Meeting for Holding onto Hope Groups.  4 pm New Life Community Church  Call for information: 623-341-5792      Prayer Needs   Formation of Healing Groups Doors continue to open to the message                        Resources Available  Shattered; One Man's Journey from Sexual Abuse      Bill's life story is captured in this compelling book.   Make a donation above to the ministry today  and receive a copy of Shattered.  What People are Saying About Shattered... "The first book I ever read cover to cover'" "Couldn't put it down" "It's like reading my own story"  "A work of Hope" A Guidebook to Healing It is designed to be a pocket type resource sharing the big picture of abuse recovery.  I believe that recovery is a life-long process.  I believe it requires a close trusted friend to share the walk.  I believe once down the road survivors have a natural desire to assist others in the journey.  The guidebook is neither a fixer, nor self-help manual only our Lord does the repairing.  It is a gift of love from a fellow broken brother and friend.  I am grateful everyday for the people that have walked with me and the faithfulness of our Lord to keep me in His eye.   Dealing with the initial stages of the healing journey can be difficult.  Order this book today from Holding on to Hope and begin to answer  questions and fears about surviving abuse and start the journey to healing. Click HERE to order a copy today  $12.00    What people are saying... "Finally, a concise healing resource" "Really helped me begin the process" "Great first step"      HELP OTHERS TELL THEIR STORY FOR THE  FIRST TIME  Bill at Age 12 when he experienced sexual abuse       Call today and schedule an Awareness event in your community...                                                  Subscribe today to Bill's Blog at www.billharbeck.com Invite Holding on to Hope to your Community  Discipling and  Spiritual Transformation for survivors of sexual abuse  Informative Programs on the Evil of Sexual Abuse in your community Training Programs for Sunday School workers, teachers, youth workers  Call or e-mail today for information.... 623-341-5792 bill@holdingontohope.org    "Blessed is the man that perseveres under trial, for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him."   Jame 1:12

Check out the video at the end of this link

Awesome Scottish daredevil biker.


http://www.liftable.com/andreadcombs/ridge/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=share&utm_campaign=bb

NIWA Anthology 2014 Releases Today!

About the Anthology:

What does "underground" mean to you?

This anthology from the Northwest Independent Writers Association presents fourteen “underground” stories, each with a different interpretation of the titular theme. In these pages, you will visit a murderer’s hideout, walk the road to the afterlife, plunder a dragon’s lair, uncover a mysterious archaeological artifact, glimpse human existence after an environmental apocalypse, and delve deep into dark secretes, crime syndicates, forbidden worlds, sacrifice, and the human psyche.

Featuring stories by:

Mike Chinakos  •  Amber Michelle Cook  •  Pamela Cowan  •  Jake Elliot  •  

Jonathan Ems  •  T.L. Kleinberg  •  Jason LaPier  •  Maggie Lynch  •  

Roslyn McFarland  •  Cody Newton  •  Dey Rivers  •  Steven L. Shrewsbury  •  

Dale Ivan Smith  •  Laurel Standley  •  Jennifer Willis 

The Northwest Independent Writers Association (NIWA) 

supports indie and hybrid authors and promotes professional standards 

in independent writing, publishing, and marketing. 

Learn more at NIWAwriters.net.

Below is a guest post by fellow Indie Writer/NIWA member Amber Cook. Amber has a story in the upcoming 2014 NIWA anthology, set to release    . The theme this year is Underground and I was lucky enough to receive an ARC copy. I read through Amber's story, "When Drake Met Thalise" first, and I really enjoyed it. I recommend grabbing a copy of the anthology by following one of the links here: http://www.amazon.com/Underground-A-Collection-Short-Fiction/dp/150295026X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1414434408&sr=8-1&keywords=underground+willis

Kindle

http://www.amazon.com/Underground-Collection-Fiction-Laurel-Standley-ebook/dp/B00OZ2R4VW

Nook

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/underground-jennifer-willis/1120651637?ean=2940150526983

Kobo

http://store.kobobooks.com/en-US/ebook/underground-58

OR by attending the launch party at Orycon, November 7-9, 2014. That's right folks it starts today! The release party will be Saturday night and you don't need a con badge to enter, but you do need to be over 21 and have ID.

Our Love-Hate Relationship with Fantasy

8/16/2014

You could say we either love it or we hate it.  And that's often true.

But it's much too complicated a relationship for such a simple dichotomy.  Almost all of us loved fantasy as children.  It's after childhood that we often come to fall into one of the love-hate camps.  

You might have given it up as an adult, or you may have turned against it even as an older young person.  Or you might never give up your love of fantasy.  You might read SF or game or make your living as a film maker or screenwriter.  But eventually it swings around, and even the biggest fantasy haters come to appreciate it again—for their children or grandchildren.  

The odd thing isn't that some people give it up in adulthood, it's how much they come to hate it.  They become fantasy haters.  

But I say those people still subject themselves to as much fantasy as someone who reads fantasy novels.  They are addicted to romantic comedies (pure fantasy), or to pornography (total fantasy), or any number of other socially accepted pass-times that are clearly desperate wish-fulfillment fantasy playing out underneath a false veneer of reality.  And personally, I think that kind of fantasy is actually harmful, or at least dubiously helpful, as it tries so hard to pretend to be reality that people get confused and disillusioned and become deeply dissatisfied because their life doesn't look like the lives in those fictitious fantasies.  No one carries shame because they aren't as bad-assed as Conan the Barbarian, but how many people are emotionally crippled because they don't look like models?

For several years I tried to capture an idea for a short story based on this dynamic of love/hate, in notes and outlines.  Every time I'd work on it, I would come up with ideas for how to turn it into a story, but they never felt right.  That's because the concept behind it is so personal to me.  I want to champion healthy, uplifting, refreshing, empowering and entertaining use of the imagination for people of all ages.

So it sat and languished, a spark of potential always flaring but never catching fire [tiny violins play a wailing pity concerto for me.  Grin].  

A couple years ago there was a writing contest I really wanted to submit to, so I sat down and—finally—was able to write the story.  Partly I think because the contest was max. 2,500 words.  I'd never written anything that short before, fiction that is.  And in some ways it was easier to try and get it out in so few words than when I was imagining a much longer short story, or a screenplay.  There is always power is trimming something down to its bare essentials to really get at the heart, or the meat, as they say, of the matter.  I thought:  2,500 words is five 500 word sections.  With only five short sections to convey the whole story in, I realized I could move the narrative forward in time, rather than explore the characters in more depth at one point in time, and the whole thing worked much better.  I started with the characters as children, advanced to high school, then on to when they are post-college age young adults, and at the twenty year high school reunion time, and ended twenty years after that.  That way the story came full-circle as those then-children, who had all loved fantasy in their play, were now past all the hate and just wanted to see their grandkids having fun. 

I’d love to hear other people’s thoughts on and experience with their love-hate relationship with fantasy.  

Blog URL:

http://ambermichellecook.weebly.com/das-blog

The Breakfast Controversy

I've essentially been promoting the idea of skipping breakfast in face of the conventional thought that it's the most important meal of the day. Really that's not 100% what I'm saying with intermittent fasting. You don't have to 'skip' breakfast to do it. I'm just saying that when I compress my eating to an eight hour window, I eat less overall and begin to lose weight. It also fits my personal lifestyle, which is an important prerequisite to having success when attempting to make a change. It may not work well with your lifestyle, but it's worth trying before you toss the idea out as crazy.

If you are going to eat breakfast, at whatever time works for you, I recommend not pounding down the carbs like the typical American. The reason we do a breakfast of carbs has a basis in science. As my friend John says, "if you're going to sin, do it in the morning when you've got all day to burn it off." It's true. But I've discovered that my resolve is greatest in the morning and if I let myself go in the morning the whole day will snowball until it's derailed. (Hows that for a mixed metaphor).

Bottom line. Eat more protean for breakfast. Here's some recipes to help out.