Fun, Amazing, Etc.

This is the official blog of indie author / adventure writer Andy R. Bunch, author of the fantasy book, "Suffering Rancor." As always, I'll post funny or amazing things I find in my travels or from poking around online. This is a great place to kick back and relax a bit. You may note that I’m not too clean or too dirty. For more information on my book, go to http://andyrbunch.weebly.com/. Here are links to first two books http://goo.gl/iHP1i and http://goo.gl/kK13W

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Gregory E. Zschomler Interview

Gregory E. Zschomler

I love your concept for kid’s books. So what got you into writing books for tween boys?
I have six boys, only two of them are currently in the age range of my books, but I wanted to give them something to read that was inspirational. BTW: I also have two girls and I have written a book (not yet published) for them as well. Anyway, there are so many books where the hero has some sort of super powers. I believe people have great potential without being a vampire or whatever. I think we have skills like intelligence and imagination that are important. We do have a journey to go on, and we need to be inspired to work with those skills to take part in the adventure.

My background is in theatre; my studies in technology and communication. I also have many years of experience in graphic design and some music. I’ve been interested in journalism, but it’s a dying thing—well, it’s changing. I maintain a couple blogs. I also attend and review plays. Every once in a while I launch into a production myself. But mostly, these days, I write. Yes, I’ve written three books for boys, but that’s not all I write.

Which of your projects has been most successful/or make you most proud?
I’ve written four plays; two of them have been performed. “About Right” has won two playwriting contests. “Bisbee Ore Bust” is a comedic-musical history of small town Bisbee, Arizona that ran there for four years. I have another one, called “The Rip Roaring Ridgefield Revue,” along the same lines that hasn’t yet been performed. It covers the history of Ridgefield, Wash. from Lewis and Clark to the founding of the high school when they decided to be the Spudders and rather than the Prunes.

My first book was a non-fiction text called “Lights, Camera, Worship.” That sold well at the time (2005-2006) and is still being used as a college teaching text. However, being about technology, it has become dated. I recently did an updated and expanded revision for a second edition. It’s in the production stage and the release date hasn’t been set.

Also I’m shopping another manuscript, “The Amish vs. The Zombies” (everyone laughs here) that’s a YA coming-of-age story and a real departure from the “safe” stuff I tend to write. It’s often gritty and grizzly and tends to go deeper into bigger issues, so I’m proud of that, too.

What is your idea of good writing?
Three words: James L. Rubart. Or one name, I guess. Seriously, of all that I’ve read his work is the best. Everything’s interesting and on several layers. I think good writing has subtext and foreshadowing. I think, in good story-telling, it’s not about structure or grammar or syntax, it’s about the author’s ability to immerse you in time and place and to emotionally—even viscerally—link you with the protagonist.

I hate serial novels (even though I get sucked into reading them) where they leave you hanging and you have to wait a year to find out what happens...and then another year and another. And so, I make sure everything is tied up at the end of my books, but also that there’s something in there that will lead to the next book. Wayne Thomas Batson is a great YA writer that does that so well.

I know authors who fill their stories with rice. I know I do that a little, but my editors help me sift it out. I’m told that if it doesn’t propel the story forward it should be removed. I do wonder about a lot of stuff, I mean is it important that my characters went to Taco Bell? Probably not, but sometimes you want to put that in too—show the slice of life. Real people do that sort of thing. I want to write real.

Also, I try to write from my faith without being preachy. I try to represent a real walk with God. I share some of the struggles and thoughts that I have.

How would you describe your process?
I think I’m different, I discover the story as I write. I have a writer friend who plots everything out in Excel; plot, characters, the works. I sit down with an idea and see what happens. I know the characters really well because I base them on myself and people I know. That allows me to create the situation and then I think, “How would they get out of that?” Sometimes I use chapter titles as a kind of outline. Like “Pirates!” that’s a title that tells me what’s going to happen in that chapter. I do change and rearrange them, but it’s not a formal outline.

Of course my Bayou Boys books have been a little shorter (20-30K) which is okay because they are written for middle-readers. In “Playhouse Phantom” the story takes place all in one house so it’s different than the first two books, which could really go anywhere. It’s based upon a real house and situation, so I drew some ideas from that and then wrote until I discovered what was going on. I think it’s my best published work to-date. I hate the idea of writing to length. I don’t like padding or redundancy, like in the “Tunnels” series. I recently read Oscar Wilde’s “The Picture of Dorian Gray” and it’s really great writing, but two entire chapters were unnecessary filler. One should write just enough to tell the story. “The Amish vs. The Zombies” is 40K and that’s what it took.

With “To Hell, Heaven and Back,” the book I’m writing now, I have a good idea what’s going to happen because some of it is taken from a real life experience. I also have certain concepts I plan to address and the rest, being science-fiction, is the artistic license that makes it all come together in a compelling way. I think it’s going to be great. I actually feel that I am meant to write this story and bring its message to the world. I think it might even cause a stir. But I digress.

I do revise. After I flog it two or three times my wife does a read/edit and I revise based on her feedback. Then I read it aloud to my sons and get their feedback. They read along over my shoulder as I do and catch things I’ve missed. One is really gifted at (anal about) continuity. I also read everything I write to my boys since my wife doesn’t get my brand of humor. That helps me know if I’m on the right track. Then I do line edits twice more. I hate it.

I write 1,500 words a day—sometimes as much as 3K. I started that with NaNoWriMo last year and it’s become a discipline, and now I don’t think I can even avoid it. I just do it. With the editing it takes me about three months to do a 30K word book. “To Hell, Heaven and Back” will be longer—probably at least 60K. I’m writing it now and anticipate the first draft being complete by Christmas.

I write plot and dialogue first, and finally I add what I call “the smells and bells;” sights, sounds, scents and other things to make it real and living.



When/where do you write?
At night. I do Facebook and email first thing in the morning. Sometimes I write in the afternoon, but I’m not really functional until after 10 a.m. I wake up before eight, but spend time with my wife. I write until 10 or 11 at night. I review plays, too and those aren’t over ‘till 10:30. I find that I can’t write the review the next day because all these thoughts swim in my head and keep me awake, so I’m up until midnight.

I typically write in coffee shops and such. The library is either too quiet or too loud with kids programs. And, like I said earlier, I don’t write with my wife (though we edit together) at home. Writing is a generally solitary activity for me.

I’m trained a bit as a journalist, with the inverted pyramid and all. (My wife always says, “Tighten and brighten.”) Longer writing is different than a news story where the important facts go up front and everything is about column inches (minimal writing to maximize space).

I’ve been pretty vocal about not growing up with a lot of support from my friends and family, and the massive help it is now that I’m getting encouragement from those I care about. Did your family support your writing?
Yes, and no. It depends on who you’re talking about and when. As a child I was more into music and theater. My dad was a really big high school athlete and won awards in every sport. He played some college ball and was a boxer in the Navy. I have always been an artist. Early on I felt I disappointed him because I wasn’t into sports. He never spoke against my interests, but it took him a while to really come around to my artistic expression. I don’t think he really got me when I was young, but, you know, he was also a very practical man. He did what he needed to do to put food on the table. He worked a jump schedule for years, one week at swing and the next at graveyard and so on. That’s not healthy for you. It made him grumpy. Well it would, you know. So it wasn’t so much that he disapproved of me as that he didn’t want me making noise when he was trying to sleep. Thing is, he really has a latent artist bent, too.

I wasn’t good at writing until after several years of college, by the way. I wrote some plays as a child, but I didn’t really have the writing bug until college. I wasn’t a good grade school English student. I got inspired by some good professors and I have worked hard at grammar and spelling, etc.

My mother was always creative herself, and encouraging and so are my sisters. Both of my parents came to most all of my performances (theater and music). Dad and my sisters now show tremendous support for my writing. Dad comes to all my book launches and reads every book I write. My mother really pushed me to discover what made me different and unique and also worked to “integrate” me (I tend to be a loner in some ways). She passed away nearly a decade back, but she really encouraged me to learn and follow my passion. She never got to read any of my fiction books.

What are some of your life adventures?
I’ve done a lot of traveling, which I love. I’ve not been off the continent, but I’ve been to Canada, and to Mexico on a mission trip. I’ve been to 37 states out of 50 with the goal to see them all. I do enjoy camping and hiking. I like to cook specialty foods. I have a special blend of Caribbean and Cajun spices that I developed (and sell).

I did a lot of whitewater canoeing back in the day, but I’m not a big adventurer now. Mostly I’ve lived in the PNW, but I’ve also lived in Colorado and Florida. I’ve been to the top of Pike’s Peak (14,114 feet above sea level) and to the bottom of Death Valley (284 feet below sea level). I’ve picked up a live rattlesnake by the tail. I’ve lived through a volcanic eruption, a couple tornados and several hurricanes. I’ve done relief work following hurricane Ivan and the Joplin tornado. I have yet to write about these experiences.

I enjoy experiencing different cultures and food. That’s what attracted me to Louisiana. I did all my research for the first book through secondary sources, but I did go there before writing books two and three. It’s so much better when you’ve been there. The tastes of the food, the smells of the bayou, the spirit and dialect of the Cajun people, the rollicking music…nothing like being there to bring it to the page.

I also love Disneyland. I go there to be recharged. I collect up thoughts all year, and most every year I go down and synthesis happens. My wife points out that I hate crowds so it doesn’t make any sense, but that’s how it is. We honeymooned there thirty years ago. My son interned at Disney World for a year so I got to go behind the scenes a little. I also did a special 14-hour behind the scenes seminar and got to meet some of the Imagineers for a Q&A, which was amazing.

I know we writers always have half a dozen irons in the fire, tell me about your new projects, what’s coming this year?
I decided to narrow it down to only three things until those are done. Number one is marketing “Playhouse Phantom,” book three of the Bayou Boys Adventure series. It’s due out October 26 in time for Halloween. Marketing is the hardest part about being an author and it takes time away from writing.
I’m also co-producing and doing some of the writing on a new rock opera called “This Child.” It’s about a family dealing with the loss of a child by leukemia. We are still in the creation phase, but we intend to start raising money for that in October and to show it next spring.

Then there’s my new book. I plan to have a finished draft by the end of November—Christmas at the latest—tentatively called, “To Hell, Heaven, and Back.” It’s about inter-dimensional travel and takes on the theological questions like God’s omniscience, and who goes to hell or heaven, and so on. It’s based on a true story about a pastor who’s driven to question everything and he meets ‘someone’ who offers to take him on a tour to get answers. It’s sci-fi-allegory in the vein of “The Shack” and tackles misbeliefs.

How did you find time to raise a family with all that going on?
I’ve made many mistakes (like not being as attentive as I should have been), but I was able to pass on a love for creativity and ambition. I believe in going after your dreams. I tried to involve my kids in what I was working on. My eldest son began working with me in theater when he was eight. Now in his twenties, he’s perusing all things theater and film. My eldest daughter owns her own business doing what she’s passionate about. Most of my children are ambitious and hard working. They follow their dreams. My second son wrote to me the other day and said that he didn’t think he could get where he wanted to go in life if he just worked for someone else. He’s always been ambitious, now he wants to start his own business, too.
My wife is also a writer and immensely talented in so many other ways. She’s finishing up her MFA studies right now. It’s good to have a spouse that understands, although we’ve discovered that we can’t write in the same room. We interrupt each other with questions and such. But she helps me so much.

What makes you come alive?
I love to inspire people to do what they were put here to do. I love helping them discover a new passion. I cast one young man in a play and then had him direct another; he went on to get a degree in theater and eventually got on the crew for the national tour of “Cats.” We still work together once in a while. I love that!
I love to speak to kids who want to be writers too. I give a presentation and then ask for questions. I love when they ask questions. What I like about kids is that they aren’t cynical yet. Some are negative, which saddens me, but for the most part they are full of potential. Everyone wants to be inspired and everyone wants to do what they believe in. If I can be a part of motivating people to pursue their dreams then I’m happy. I have a niece whom I am very proud of. She’s in New York trying to break in as an actress. She’s told me that I inspired her to follow her heart.

Closing Thoughts?
Do what moves you. If you write (be it books, scripts or whatever), move others. Art, whatever it is, is the thing that expresses our humanness. We are all born in the image of our Creator to be creators. And if you write—or even if you don’t—read broadly. Read my books. Lol

Gregory E. Zschomler can be found on Facebook and Twitter (@zschomler). His author blog/website is: gregoryezschomler.blogspot.com His books are available on Amazon.


Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Improving your dialogue

Hey gang,
I'm always looking for ways to improve my writing, revising, and editing. I've been reading Novel Shortcuts by Laura Whitcomb, and its inspired me to write a little of my own thinking on the topic.

Close up on dialogue:
Instinctively writers are good at some aspects of dialogue or another, but seldom all aspects of dialogue. So it’s worth being aware of all the aspects so you can make sure you’re hitting all the points you can in your writing.

Speaking of hitting all the points, your dialogue is part of a scene and must move the story forward. Is the dialogue necessary? Or do you have a long chain of dialogue in place of a more appropriate form of exposition? What do we learn?

Is it concise? What is the goal or conflict being conversed? Does the character misinterpret anything? What is left unspoken? Or more importantly, what is left unresolved?

These are important questions to answer when revising your novel. Depending on your answers you’ve got two ways to fix that dialogue; either cut the fat or add characterization. Cutting the fat is straight forward. Rewrite it more concisely. Adding character is a way of killing two birds with one stone. Say you’ve written a series of dialogue in which one character shares plot development with another character, and thereby the reader, but it runs unavoidably long. Make sure that the characters are speaking in a way that communicates who they are. It’s a good idea anyway, but it’s an extra grievance to have long dialogue chains without at least reinforcing the characters distinct personalities.

To do this, revisit your character sketches and ask these questions (taken from Novel Shortcuts by Laura Whitcomb).

Is this person educated or simple?
Quiet or verbose?
Does he/she hide their feelings or wear their heart on their sleeve?
Casual or formal? Modern or old fashioned?
Do they have a hobby or social group that would pepper their verbiage choice with slang? (Scifi nerd? Sports nut?)
Confident? Nervous? Optimistic? Pessimistic?
Is this their Mother Tongue?
Do they have a speech impediment or accent?
Do they inject humor into anything they say or perhaps use diplomacy at all times?
Do you need to incorporate anything to communicate a historic time for the book?

Finally, be sensitive to the potential for impact in what’s being said. Most of the time, a phrase like, “Are you hungry?” is best written quickly and simply, where a phrase like, “I love you,” is worth rewriting a few times for maximum impact. You can’t hand craft every line, but you should have some memorable ones in the mix. Give yourself a, “Frankly, my darling, I don’t give a damn.” Or a “Here’s looking at you, kid.” Something memorable could make your novel catch on with your audience. 

Monday, August 12, 2013

Diet Update and More!

Well this is a good time to do my next diet update. I won't weigh myself again until tomorrow but I finally feel pretty consistently good. I've got good energy today. I helped a friend moved some boxes to storage and now I'm at coffee to get some things done. I'm making every effort to get out of the house and start work early (I've got a bunch of gigs all of a sudden), but that didn't go so well on day one. I slept through the alarm until my normal wake up time. But I feel good and that counts for something. I've only got one week left of cycle 1, then I've got to figure out how I want to do cycle 2. It's tempting just to follow her directions exactly, but I really want to get to my 'new' normal (cycle 3) so I can start figuring out how to cut costs. This healthy crap is expensive.

I decided to try a new product or two each week and rate them based on taste, price and how I feel after eating them. It didn't occur to me to report back on that here. I wish it had, because I need to start tracking this sort of info. I don't think I can catch up but I'll do two today.

First is tanka bars, which are buffalo and cranberry juice jerky type stuff. I threw away the wrapper so I looked up the website and it seems they offer several products. The only one I saw at whole foods was two flavors of the bar. The one I've eaten so far was billed as spicy and didn't disappoint. I've got another one at home that says it's hotter. I liked the one I had so I'm looking forward to the other. The flavor was fantastic which was refreshing. I've had quite a few misses in a row. The size was about 3 bites and I felt fine after eating it. The cost was terrible at $3.50. So over all I give it 2 out of three stars.


The other product I tried was called Super by Happy Squeeze. It's packaged like a drink but I'd put it in the applesauce category. Only 100 cals per container and I found the containers quite convenient. The flavor was great compared to a lot of the healthy stuff I've tried. I bought pomegranate,  blueberry, pear and salba. Good stuff. The best thing about this was the price. I don't recall exactly but I found it at winco for around $1.00 on sale. It was with the survival food in a bucket that winco has been selling lately (interesting times we live in, eh?). It doesn't have to be refrigerated until opened, which is a big plus for me. Technically this is probably baby food but I found it refreshing and felt good after eating it. I give it 3 out of 3 stars.

Today's child safe joke: What does a fish say when it completes a mission?
Fishion accomplished.

Today's senior safe joke:
A respectable lady rescued a couple female parrots from a shelter only to discover they used foul language. Worst of all they'd spout indecent proposals like, "hey big boy, why don'cha come inside and I'll blow your mind."
In frustration the lady consulted her parson who assured her that his two boy parrots would reform her wayward birds because all they did every day was pray. So the lady brought her two birds over and stuck them in the cage with the parson's birds.
Immediately, one of the lady parrots said, "Come on over big boy." The other lady bird said, "Polly wants more than a cracker."
"Hallelujah!" exclaimed one of the boy birds. The other agreed, "Thank God, our prayers have finally been answered."

Everyone have great day. If I keep feeling this good, I'm going to strongly recommend the Virgin diet for everyone. Sooo....stay tuned for more of Andy experimenting on himself so you don't have to.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Bonus Post: 'cause I missed one this week



SOL: The $350 Ubuntu laptop that runs on solar power

Below is another gem from Gizmag. But first here's a quick update on the diet. I wanted to wait until I could report on my progress with a positive attitude. Not that I don't have good things to report, I'm actually losing a steady 1lb a day. This is day 12 of 21 so I'm over the hump. I'm also finally starting to feel good. Well I had some good hours during that last couple days, but Yesterday and today I feel more normal for the first time since I started. The entire first week I felt like fertilizer. Now I feel pretty good for about 20 minutes, then I feel run down for about 25 minutes, and then I feel inexplicable rage for about 5 minutes (which I have so far not taken out on people.) 


http://thevirgindiet.com/
My partner in this diet experiment, Kristin, is reporting a much better time of it. She is feeling healthy and not bothered by the food restrictions. The ruin of her morning coffee and not being able to partake of the fun when she goes out with friends has gotten her down a couple times. Like last Friday night when she made me watch oxygen channel for 2 hours while she sat with her arms crossed, scowling. Aside from that she's been her normal, cheery self. 

I'm still reading the book (4 chapters to go) and the strangest side effect has been the bouts of turrets I experience while reading it. I'll read that the total daily limit of nuts is 30 cashews and...I actually feel a bout coming on now so I'll stop and let you read about a nifty laptop... 

In the Western world, we tend to take for granted some pretty basic amenities, like reliable electricity. For people living in those corners of the globe where electricity can be scarce, WeWi Telecommunications, Inc. has developed the SOL, a rugged laptop that doesn't rely on a power socket to stay charged. The Ubuntu Linux-powered computer is instead equipped with a detachable solar panel, which the developers claim will provide up to 10 hours of battery life after just two hours in the sun.


Original post link

We've seen solar-powered laptops before, but never one that promised to be this energy efficient. WeWi claims the SOL never actually needs to be plugged into an electrical outlet to charge, but it still has the option in case you need to keep working late into the night. The solar panel can even detach and connect to an extension cord, so you can use the computer indoors and still keep it charged with direct sunlight.
Aside from benefiting the owner by supplying a readily-available energy source, the SOL's solar panels should also help the environment by reducing air pollution. According to the developers, each SOL computer could prevent approximately a ton of CO2 emissions from being released into the atmosphere during its lifetime simply by not charging it exclusively through a power socket.

The designers hope the SOL can serve as a reliable computer for students in developing nations and globe-trotting adventurers alike, which is why the entire device has been designed for durability and built from reinforced materials. Inside the case, the SOL houses an Intel Atom D2500 1.86 GHz Duo Core processor with an Intel 945GSE chipset. Users will have access to 320 GB of HDD storage as well as 2–4 GB of DDRIII SDRAM, depending on what the buyer chooses. The whole computer has been optimized with Ubuntu in mind and comes pre-loaded with a suite of productivity tools, but WeWi has stated that another OS can be installed if needed.
The SOL uses a built-in Intel GMA3600 graphics card with a 13.3 in LCD HD screen, which the designers are confident won't drain the battery too quickly. The laptop has a 3 MP webcam fitted to the front along with two speakers and an internal mic for online video chats, plus inputs for USB 2.0, headphones, and HDMI, among others. It also includes a few options for connecting to the internet, such as Wi-Fi and 3G/4G/LTE, plus connections for GPS and Bluetooth. Customers will even have a choice to add a satellite communications module for especially remote areas.

WeWi has not revealed a release date for its solar-powered laptop just yet, but the company has noted there are two distinct models in the works: the SOL and the SOL Marine, the latter of which will be waterproof. The company is determined to make the computer as accessible as possible, which is why it plans to distribute both versions worldwide at a budget price of US$350 and $400 respectively. Customers will also have a choice between a variety of color schemes for the case, including black, gray, red, and bright green.
Source: SOL

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

After Action Report: Loyal Local 2013

I over slept a little but I had plenty of time to set up as long as I skipped breakfast...

...but I got coffee, Hurrah! That was my first time into Torque across the street from the event. I posted about it a little during the event including this pic which I think is awesome.

I shared a table with Greg Zschomler of Voodoo Virus fame. Great guy and he really knows how to decorate a booth. The next table to our right was Phil Silver of PBJBooks and (Susie S. whom I'm sad to say I didn't get her contact info). I didn't want to hold the blog up to get more info on Susie, but I will be editing this part when I get a hold of Phil and get her info. Anyway, she also wrote children's chapter books.

The booths around us were really cool. I was too busy to get many pics of the awesome artwork like Bill Perkins of Artastix and Kaha Spirit arts but I they have some better pics than I could get on their websites. There were a ton there, actually and I was too busy selling to see them all. I have to highlight a couple more though.

Deda's Bakery looked so good. They gave out samples but my crazy diet (update to follow soon) doesn't allow me to enjoy such things. The loving wife part of that dynamic duo is also a writer and will soon be generating her own indie novels. Go Catherine!

I did bend the rules a bit on the diet and sample two vendor's wears: Nut-ricious makes nut butters that will make you forget you can make peanut butter. They can be found at whole foods or ordered on line, but I'd recommend visiting their booth at the Vancouver Farmer's Market. The other was a salsa by The red bicycle guy. Fantastic! The salsa and the nut butter were both on the diet but the chips weren't.

I sampled some from the table to my left which was totally on the diet. Fouresse is a shop that carries only Olive Oil and Balsamic Vinegars. 70 kinds. You have to try it!

I was struck by the amount of talent and hard work I saw on display. I really hadn't thought a lot about what was happening in Vancouver, WA. outside the writing circles I travel in. So here's some photos I did get.






Finally, I want to mention a cool guy named Nicholas Tomihama. I didn't recognize him at first, but then I realized that I've been following his videos for ages. Nic makes PBC bows and writes books about it. He has a lot of videos on the topic also. You need to check those out.


Thanks again for reading. It's been fun so far, and the adventure will continue. The goal is to post an update on my diet tomorrow, but I'm out of time now and I had to catch you up to last Sunday. We'll also get a couple of these awesome authors to guest blog soon, so lots of fun to come.

Saturday, August 3, 2013

False Memories???

Well somehow my Monday, Wednesday, Friday posting schedule turned into a giant Tuesday and Saturday post. I'm forced to give myself grace again. I'm learning though. It was a fun and productive week, just not quite what I thought I'd get done. Sort of an ugly hand off from July to August but it'll get the job done.

Here's a story about planting artificial memories in lab mice. That's right, inception is becoming possible.
It makes me think about where our memories really come from. I have some friends that rewrite their personal history almost immediately and it drives me crazy. After a night when they get smashed and nearly start a bar fight over a hot woman who was sitting next to her MMA fighting boyfriend, they'll tell you how much fun they had the last night and how much that one chick kept coming onto them. When you explain your version of reality they claim it doesn't sound right at all.

It's frustrating for me, because I don't see how anyone can make better choices if they're willing to blind themselves to the reality of their behavior. Then again I have other friends who magnify their failings. We need to realize that only part of our perception is really real. I'm not talking about subjective truth here. I'm merely saying that only certain parts of what we've experienced is objectively real. The rest of what our minds record is our response to the objective facts.

Nor do I agree that facts = truth. Who we really are is often 180 degrees from how we've lived out our experiences. I believe that when something bad happens, dark forces try to interpret that event for us. We often make an agreement with the darkness. For example, we don't know the answer to an obvious question and we think, "I didn't know because I'm stupid." Are you? Are you really stupid or did you just not know some trivial thing that others happened to? The book, Self Esteem, by McKay and Fanning calls the dark force, the pathological critic.

Sometimes I'm so terrified of being proud and then falling, that I avoid trying at things I don't know I can do. Sometimes I feel like a compilation of my past failures, and it's hard to see the things about me that are worthy of applause. Sometimes lose out of the gate, just to avoid the trying and falling short.

Now I said sometimes for a reason. Don't freak out. There's a difference between feeling down on occasion and being clinically depressed. I feel just fine right now, but I wanted to touch on the topic. We have to question just how much we are going to let the past shape our future. I'll leave you with this definition of forgiveness. "Forgiveness is letting go of the possibility of a better past."

Have a great day and I'll see you all tomorrow at the Loyal Local event in the Hilton downtown Vancouver.